A Reassuring Flush

I’m actually blogging in real time. Meaning, I’m not three weeks behind trying to catch up. This also means my next post is about the past.

Today is a big day. Today is Lily’s first day in big girl underwear. I have been dreading this day for months. Basically since the day Lily was born and I knew I would have to potty train another child. Potty training (or toilet learning if you want to be all PC) the first child is sort of exciting at first. Underwear, potties and bribes are purchased. Everyone is filled with anticipation and excitement. That wears off quickly. But with the second, one of you might have some excitement and anticipation, and it’s probably the younger one that doesn’t realize how defeating this is about to be to the bigger people in the house. You dust off the plastic potties that were packed away so joyously prior, take some well used underwear out of a plastic tote, find a bag of candy that might be hanging out in the dark corner of the cupboard and fake excitement over this new phase. Obviously, there are successes that everyone rejoices in, otherwise, we’d all be wandering around in adult diapers.

Diapers are just so easy! I never worry that every car trip is going to end in me having to strip down and detail a super elaborately built car seat. I never have to drop my entire cart in the middle farthest corner of Target to dash to the bathroom because the little one waits until they are in Code Red bladder status to alert you that they feel they need to urinate. You don’t *have* to do laundry daily/multiple times a day, or mop, or stain treat the couch/rug/bed.

So here we are in the midst of day one. I keep having to remind myself that we’re only in day one. Perhaps by day four or even 14, we’ll be able to claim some success. It’s only day one. The trainee is napping in a diaper. The washing machine is humming away with six failures. The M&Ms are still snuggly in their bag, untouched. But it’s only the first half of day one. And as Lily and I change her underwear, again, off in the distance I hear it…a flush…the sound of success. The reminder that even though this phase is hard and challenging, someday, Lily is going to be self sufficient in the toileting arena just like her sister. And not that long ago, I was balancing a newborn and wiping up spills, changing undies and having some embarrassing adult temper tantrums over wet pants…but we did it, we both persevered and had success.

I have to remember that for the last 898 days of Lily’s life, she has used a diaper (most of the time!). Now today, I’m asking her to change and do something completely different from what she’s ever known.

Lily is excited. This underwear thing is is a big deal to her. It puts her on another level of maturity like her sister. It’s also the key to going to school. She knows that she has to wear underwear and go potty on the toilet to go to school. In fact, if you mention Garden of Hope, she gets all giggly and will automatically say, “go pee on the potty!” She is even more excited to get an M&M, or “Nem and Nem” as she calls it. Ella is also keeping tabs on this, as she knows she will get a “Nem” by default.

Since every parenting guide, potty training guide, and parent will tell you something different technique-wise, I don’t have a lot of great ideas of what to do or what will work. However, from my past experience. We’re going to try the boot camp method. I just decided to go all-in with underwear (except for sleeping). We’re going to hang out at home as much as possible this week and see what happens. I never know if I should remind Lily to go, or leave her alone so she learns how to read her body. I’m just leaving her be for now with a few encouragements. I think Lily just needs a couple of successes and it will really click.